It is NOT a Waste

 The world of the performing arts never ceases to change during these times. ESPECIALLY with regard to how auditions are being formulated.

The most frustrating aspect of THIS audition season is the presence of the uncontrollable.

Technology has become so much a part of this year's audition season; a fact that I actually think is valuable. It's good to teach yourself new techniques to add to your level of performance.

However, what is incredibly infuriating is when something occurs with technology that is simply beyond your control.

Earlier this week, I planned for a successful day recording audition footage. I woke up early to set up my room as a makeshift studio. I removed my artwork form a wall, pinned my blue bed sheet into place, connected all the wires between my microphone, computer and camera, so on and so forth.

Everything was ready.

I had scheduled a coaching that morning with my support system in order to make the process easier. I firmly believe that having an audience, even online, makes recording audition footage feel smoother and altogether more like an actual performance.

Everything was in place and my audience was in attendance.

Then, my internet decided to play a game of hide and seek.

I had stressed out so much about this day that I couldn't help but feeling like I was falling apart because of this minor inconvenience. It meant that my audience couldn't see or hear exactly what I was doing which dampened my spirits, more so than I had thought it would.

I began to cry.

But then my support system helped me get back on my feet and I churned out a recording that I had hoped would show the best of my abilities.

Unfortunately, it was just not meant to happen on that day.

Everyone has bad days and this particular recording day I had planned in advance, turn out to be a bad day for my body. I became frustrated with my voice and my body. I had hoped to record two arias, but my body was saying "NO!"

Later in the day, after some discussion, it was decided that the recording I made didn't show me at my best. Instead, we would try again on another day.

I admit that I felt a little defeated. I had spent the entire day devoted to making this video and it felt like I had wasted the day. I knew that re-recording on another day was the best decision and plan of action, but it still stung.

I did what any person does when they feel like they are sinking in a pit... I called my mom.

She told me what deep down I already knew... the day was NOT a waste.

I now had an idea of what it was like to film a video in the style that is required this season. My support system carried me through the day and have promised to assist me in the upcoming rounds of recording. My friends and family spoke honestly with me, which is what I wanted, and now I will move forward to produce even better results.

It wasn't a waste.

My efforts are NOT a waste.

On a random note, I am grateful to this blog. It allows me to voice the feelings/thoughts that I would otherwise keep to myself. It serves as a vehicle to relinquish the thoughts that buzz like bees in my head so that I can move forward.

I am fortunate to have a support system that provides love, advice, guidance and more.

For every performer out there struggling through this audition season, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

It is hard, but you are not alone. Hang in there and remember that you LOVE to perform.

Life is a journey and your hard work and efforts are NEVER a waste.

-Samantha Noonan



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